Problem page
It doesn’t matter what the problem is – how big or small you feel it to be. We will respond to every e mail we receive but please txt us and we will get back to you asap if you have an urgent question or need to speak to a trained youth worker in person.
I’m 16 and I’m not out to anybody. I’ve just finished my GCSEs and and I want to go with a bunch of mates camping – it’s a lads holiday and I will have to share with 1 other. I really like one of my mates but I think he’s straight – he wants to share a tent with me and I’m kind of not sure whether I can handle that. What should I do – should I come out or not – should I share a tent with him?
SexYOUality response
Hmmm that sounds like a tough situation – you obviously know your friends better than us and it’s crossing your mind whether you should come out – so in a sense you’ve started your coming out journey. Coming out is very individual and personal and you don’t have to come out to everybody all at once.
Don’t feel pressurised to come out just because of this holiday – before you’re ready. Could you ask one of your other friends if you could share with them? If you want to chat this through with a youth worker then do get in touch.
I’m 18 and I’ve been seeing a girl I really like but I think that in the past she’s been sleeping around. Last week I noticed some white discharge. What should I do and I really like this girl – how can I tell her?
SexYOUality response
First of all well done for not ignoring your symptoms and getting in touch – sexual health issues can be difficult to talk about. You need to get yourself checked out for sexually transmitted infections (STI) – and you can do this by contacting your GP/Nurse or sexual health clinic (local hospital/family planning clinic) see our Advice and Support page for more information. I would not have intimate sexual contact with your girlfriend until you’ve got yourself checked out.
Your alarm bells are ringing but this could be thrush which is not sexually transmitted. If you do find that this is an STI – it is important that your girlfriend also gets checked out so that you don’t end up re-infecting each other. Honesty and openness is a key part of any healthy relationship. The health practice that you attend will also be able to give you advice on how to keep yourself safe in future – eg dams.
I’m 15, I don’t think I’m a lesbian but I’ve got really close to my best friend and last week my dad walked in on us kissing in the bedroom. He’s been really off with me and walks out of the room whenever I come in. Help I really don’t know what to do.
SexYOUality response
It seems like in this situation you might need to have a chat with your dad to clear the air. If you’re unsure of your dad’s response it may be helpful to have somebody that you trust with you – maybe another adult rather than your best friend at this stage. It’s important for you to know that you don’t have to identify as gay/lesbian, bisexual or straight – labels aren’t always helpful and people change their preferences in their lifetime.
It does seem from your e mail that you care about your relationship with your dad and an honest chat might help you both. If you need any support before or after talking to your dad – do get in touch and remember there’s a drop in on Thursday afternoons for 14 – 16 year olds who identify as LGB or Questioning.
